Does age really matter? Or is it just a number?
For Neil Christian and Shiela Loto, despite a 20-year age gap, love was a choice they made, overcoming the doubts and concerns of people who didn’t approve of their relationship.
“Mixed reactions ang natanggap at narinig namin. Siyempre, hindi nawawala ang judgement at criticism from some of our friends and other people,” Neil Christian said.
Where did it all start?
The Lotos’ love story began unexpectedly, and it all started when Shiela, then 41, gave Neil Christian, 21, an energy drink.
“Nagkita kami ng wife ko sa isang basketball event,” Neil Christian said, reminiscing that sport event in April 2013. “Nag start ang love story namin dahil binigyan nya ako ng Gatorade.”
At the time, Neil Christian was just a backup player, not a key member of the team. His teammates, who were working hard to win the game, were curious about where he got the energy drink when all they had was water.
“The following day, habang naghahanap ako ng work, nakareceive ako ng call. Akala ko interview na, nag practice pa ako ng isasagot sa Tell Me About Yourself,” Neil Christian recalled, unaware that it was actually Shiela, who had gotten his number through acquaintances.
From that unexpected call, their friendship grew over the next year. By April 2014, they officially became a couple. Two years later, on December 13, 2016, they chose to tie the knot in Dubai—proving that love knows no age or boundaries.
Facing judgment and criticism
Neil Christian shared that while some family and friends were open-minded and supportive, others had concerns about their decision to marry after just a year of dating.
“Kaya ko lang daw pinakasalan ang asawa ko dahil wala akong work and maganda ang work ng asawa ko,” Neil Christian said. “Gagawin ko lang din daw na past time yung wife ko dahil malayo ang age gap namin,” he shared people’s judgement and criticism.
Some even questioned if Neil Christian had a secret wife in the Philippines, but he clarified that he was single when he met Shiela.
Others went as far as calling them “mother and son.”
“Bakit daw nagpakasal ako sa wife ko; parang nanay ko na raw siya. Ako naman, parang anak na daw niya,” he added.
Proving haters wrong
Despite these hurtful remarks, Neil Christian and Shiela remained unfazed, proving that love isn’t defined by age but by mutual respect, understanding, and commitment. They have now been married for almost a decade.
“Overcoming judgment and criticism is a skill we learn over time,” Neil Christian said. “At first mahirap talaga kasi puro kami ang laman ng usapan, but we learn that hindi namin sila kailangang pansinin at we need to focus more on our relationship and our goal in life.”
For their critics, Neil Christian shared they just pray for them. “Hindi naman namin sila pwedeng diktahan sa iniisip nila, diba? So we focus on our relationship. We show them that we are happy, that we are successful, and that we are even stronger day by day,” he said.
“I know that she’s the one for me kasi nakita ko na sinusuportahan niya yung mga desisyon ko,” Neil Christian described his wife. “At hindi siya takot i-correct ako if my decision is not okay or kung may nagagawa akong mali. Lagi siyang nag-i-step up if alam niyang mapapahamak ako sa desisyon na gagawin ko,” he added.
He also described Shiela as someone who works to keep the relationship strong, whether through communication, spending quality time together, or always helping keep things calm and steady.
Love that lasts
Nowadays, many couples struggle to make their marriages last—even those within the same age range. But for Neil Christian and Shiela, whose love defied a 20-year age gap, longevity isn’t about age—it’s about commitment.
Neil Christian shared his secret to a lasting and happy marriage: “First, put God in the center of your relationship. And do not forget your wedding vow. Also choose the right friends, group, or community that will help you grow together mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.”
For Neil Christian and Shiela, their age difference was never an issue. What truly mattered was how their marriage made them better individuals. In the end, love isn’t measured by years, but by the daily choice to grow, commit, and build a life together.
